A blond woman with a good mind got tired of people laughing at her behind her back. So she applied herself at school, majored in American Literature, graduated Summa Cum Laude in her BA, MA, and PhD studies, in which she examined "The Bias and Basis for Humor Employed in 'Dumb Blonde Jokes.'" In a supreme act of vindication, she landed a contract with a major publishing firm to write a book of blonde jokes, which immediately landed on the NY Times Top 10 list and sold millions of copies and was translated into many foreign languages. She thought to herself that she would have the last laugh.
Still, everywhere she went, people laughed at her behind her back. On TV talk shows, especially the ones with brunette hosts. On radio shows, where it wasn't as obvious to the audience. Even at book signings, it seemed that people were trying to hold in a snicker every time they passed by her. It made her so mad she complained to a friend, "Here I am with advanced degrees in American Literature, a contract with a major publisher, and a hit joke book selling millions of copies in 30 different countries around the world, and people still treat me like a 'dumb blonde.'"
"Wow," said the friend. "Millions of copies? You must be raking in the royalties."
"Royalties?" said the blonde with a stunned look on her face. "What are royalties?"
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I can't steal this joke cuz I don't get it. :o(
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if you're teasing me or not.... Do you know what royalties are? When you get paid a certain percentage of each book's sales? Like, if you write a magazine article, maybe you'll get paid $10 or $50 or $5000, depending on the article and the circulation of the magazine. Books, though, you might get paid $300 for the book with no royalties, or instead get paid $100 for the book, plus 50 cents for each copy sold.
ReplyDeleteAndrew told me that your son asked him the riddle about what Kermit the Frog and Attila the Hun had in common, and your son was surprised to know that Andrew had the answer already. They decided that one of their moms was stealing jokes from the other. ROFLOL!! I think joke-stealing is great!!! The more laughing we spread around, the better it is for all of us! So steal all you like!
I don't get the royalties. :o) Yes, I was teasing ... bad yoke :o(
ReplyDeleteI took your "I fall in chocolate" saying last night since that described exactly where I was at. I put it in facebook. I don't know where you get all this good stuff ... personally, I'm too lazy to find it myself. Thanks for being so industrious!
I thought you were red-headed. We can't make dumb-blonde jokes about a smart red-head!
ReplyDeleteMost of the jokes are coming out of a file of very very old emails that either the kids or I saved to laugh at later. Someday I'll run out.... eeeks!