The pope dies and goes to heaven. St Peter welcomes him. "Everything heaven has is yours," he tells the pope.
The pope asks, "Do you happen to have transcripts of the conversations Jesus had with His followers?"
"Yes, we do," says St Peter, and shows him to an enormous library. He pulls an enormous book off the shelf, hands it to the pope, and leaves him alone.
Hours later, he returns to find the pope pounding his fists on the table and sobbing. "I don't believe it!" cries the pope, "There's an r! There's an r!"
"Are you all right?" St. Peter asks with alarm.
"There's an r!" yells the pope again. "It says celebrate!"
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