Bonnie is one of the lovely women at church. She was widowed quite suddenly last fall. Ever since I've known her, she always seems such the optimist. She knows and believes and says that God is working everything out just right, and even when things hurt, she still cheerfully confesses that He is good and gracious, and her praise for Him abounds. On Sunday she was kindly and encouragingly reminding me that it doesn't matter if I feel overwhelmed, because we are in God's care, and it will all work out, and what's necessary will be done (because if it doesn't get done it wasn't really necessary after all).
And then today I spent hours on errands, including an exploratory trip to the west, which ended at my friend's store, after five other stops. And a trip to fetch milk. And catching up on laundry and bread-baking after vacation. And dinner. And Paul and I tried to figure out some things about registering for classes for his freshman year for college next August. And the little car's brakes failed, so we had to get it in to the mechanic and are now waiting on the verdict. (I hate deciding whether a car is getting too old and worn to fix again!)
I kept thinking throughout the day of all the necessary things that weren't getting done. And how I just keep getting more and more behind. I wish I could believe in my gut what my intellect consents to: that Bonnie is right and that God does know what He's doing. I just wish I didn't chafe against it and argue over it so often.
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You're so funny, well we all are pretty funny, from time to time. Look at your list: preparing a young man for college, making and buying food (I think that ranks high on the necessary list), making sure the people who drive Zippy (I'm guessing) are safe, keeping people in clean clothes...we don't like it, but these are some of the necessary things of life. I really want to get our basement fully in order...but laundry, buying food, changing diapers, and feeding people keep coming first. I have no idea what I am doing with Mary next year...maybe in time, with the ability to reflect on all these years, we can join gracious Bonnie (I would love to meet her) and realize that all the important things God has given us to do, were done. And it all was good.
ReplyDeleteLaura---who is looking forward to a few days of just reflecting on the gift of life and God's Word. See you soon!
You're right, Laura, cooking and doing laundry and helping a kid figure out a college catalog are indeed necessary. But so is calling the septic guy and having him bring out the second batch of topsoil, and so is watering the lettuce that stayed dry through the storms (too close to the house), and so is washing a rug that got pooped on by a naughty cat.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, it's Zippy that's in the shop. And she was given the diagnosis of terminal illness. Tonight we're discussing pulling the plug and disconnecting life-support. The mechanic told us that if he fixes her, the rusty parts next to the fixed parts will surely be damaged in the process. If not, the nearby parts will need repair soon. He reminded me that there comes a time when you just have to haul out the pistol and put the horse out of its misery. So now we have to decide whether she'll be replaced, or whether we'll finagle with car-pooling to work, sharing vehicles, and sending a kid to college without a car.