Today's Laugh

For Eamonn --

A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player. When she came home that evening, her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"

"Nah," said the first girl. "That tight, dry, tiny little pucker. It was no fun at all."

The next night she went out with a tuba player. When she came home, the roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat. It was just gross!"

The next night she went out with a French horn player. When she came back, the roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"

"His kissing was just so-so. But I loved the way he held me."


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and for Kara --

What's the difference between a viola and an onion?
No one cries when you cut up a viola.