Friday, December 26, 2008


The nice post-master smiled at me today as I mailed some textbooks to ebay customers. I'm getting to where I recognize the clerks at the post office here.

When Gary and I were first married, we expected to be moving all over. Even though we had two years of college left, we took an apartment that we would be allowed to rent for only a year. The fantastic rental price and the neighborhood was worth it, even though we'd have to find a second apartment. We knew there would be the move to sem, the move to vicarage, the move back to sem, and the move out to his first call. It was all an expected part of his education, and everybody else in his class was doing it too, so everything stayed in a state of flux, and that was okay.

After about half a year in Wautoma, I realized that we couldn't stay. The situation was transitional from the get-go. We would either move to the village where Gary had the mission-start, or there'd be some other change. We knew the time in the parsonage, and just a block from Wietings and three blocks from the library, was going to be short-lived.

So when we moved to the next place, I yearned for it to be permanent. Even when the pay was low, even when we found out that pastors stayed there only 2-3 years before moving on, even when midweek services were practically empty, I eventually came to accept that God was going to have us live there till we died, and there is definitely some comfort in that kind of rooted-ness.

So now we've moved again. It's getting close to a year now. I recognize some of the faces at the library and the grocery store and the post office. I should be following Tammy's lead (a friend who moved here less than a year before we did, and for the same reason) and doing more exploring to find the streets and the stores and the restaurants that are around here, trying to make myself feel at home. But I don't. I just do what I need to do to get by.

People tell me that this feeling of instability is good. (Well, at least, some people do.) They say we should not be attached to this world, but always feel like pilgrims on our way to our heavenly home. They say we should not be "stuck" or settled or too comfortable in our home, but always be ready to go wherever the Lord calls.

But I want to be settled and stable.


  1. There's way too much food for thot here, dear Susan... we've both got a history, don't we, with the idea of "stability."

    Sigh. (and hugs.)

  2. I completely understand. Within our first 6 years of marriage, we moved 5 times. It was really hard!

    I love where we live now. It felt like home within months. I still haven't found a network of good friends, but sometimes that takes years. I hope that we will stay here (in this beautiful house and lovely small town) for a long, long time.

  3. I always thought I wanted to be settled but I don't think I really do. We just past 2 years in this house (the longest we've lived anywhere is 2.5 years) and I'm so ready to move. We find our family becoming more and more settled as we have become active in our community and we hate it. I think I've finally come to the realization that our family will never be happy with where we live and will always be looking for something better.

  4. Susan, how can it be a year? Where does the time go?
    We're praying about whether to stay in DC or not. We haven't met many people, nor have we joined a church. After 20 years in one place, it seems strange to be newcomers here. But we know God has a plan, and we're trying to wait patiently for it to unfold. Sure hope you find the feeling of stability that you need.

  5. Oh, Barbara, you're thinking of moving again? Well, I guess if the jobs are portable, and if you don't have to wait on a house to sell, it would be something to consider. It's hard to know sometimes what we're supposed to be doing, isn't it?

  6. Yes, and while our work is portable, neither brings in enough to live on. He needs to find a regular job, and they're few and far between right now. So we're still praying, but if we end up moving, I'd sure like to be closer to my older kids, so we'll see.....

    BTW, enjoying the photos of your adorable granddaughter! :)