I don't make New Year's resolutions. But this year I am. Not because it's the new year and time to do that. But it just so happens I have a resolution that I resolved on January 1-2, so I guess we know what we call that, eh?
I hereby resolve to be less patient, less forgiving, less kind, and less forebearing. When a person is a mother (or in some other position in charge of people) it seems that patience in the face of rudeness or squabbling or disobedience has only one result: giving the offender permission to continue sinning. And I'm disgusted with myself for the things I sometimes let continue. God help me to crack down unemotionally with the punishments when the offenses are small, before the offenses get big enough that my anger is all-consuming. Not unlike Giuliani's cracked window policy.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
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I realize that you are being serious, and I don't really disagree with you in principle. But your comment made me chuckle, because it called to mind that speech that Sandra Bullock made in "Miss Congeniality," in which she wished for tougher punishments of parole violators. Of course, when that received no reaction from the crowd, she then added a hope for "world peace," which was met with tremendous applause.
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking that a proper distinction of the Law and the Gospel is the particularly bright light by which to discern when parenting ought to wield the left hand or the right (let the reader understand). But my brain is foggy and tired at the moment (or snowy and tired, more likely, given this winter wonderland we're living in). So I'll save such ruminations for another day.
This sounds like a very sensible, grown up adaptation. Doing the slow burn isn't healthy.
ReplyDeleteYep, far better to say a little 'you will stop that now' in a calm voice than.......
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite parenting books:
Assertive Discipline for Parents - it isn't about being nice just being clear of expectations.
Botheration.....I think I resolved to do basically the same thing when first signs of obnoxious foreign behavior entered the house. "The rule in the house is.....you will stop doing whatever it is....now" Neat and tidy.
I like your resolution - good idea! I wish I had been that wise when my children were young. :)
ReplyDeleteRick, it just so happens that Wednesday morning I was standing in my kitchen, holding an imaginary microphone to my mouth, quoting "That would be harsher punishments for parole violators, Stan."
ReplyDelete:-)