Sometimes it gets to the point that the kids just can't pick up when the mother tells them to. They go to the bedroom. They make an attempt. But nothing really gets accomplished. Not quite understanding why this is, the mother then sits on the bed, giving instructions, micro-managing the kid's way through the picking-up chore.
Ah. Then the mother discovers why "picking up" has not resulted in a "picked-up room" for the last month or so.
Why is it that we must keep candy wrappers under the bed or in the sock drawer instead of putting them in the garbage can? If a person were to actually go to the trouble to PICK UP the candy wrapper and "put it away" in a sock drawer, mightn't it just have been easier to drop it in the waste can that's right there?
Why is it that receipts for the last several candy bars are being stowed away in the jewelry box? Now, stowing chocolate itself in the jewelry box... that I can understand: it's valuable stuff. But the receipts?
Why is it that a person can helpfully be making orange juice for the family, and manage to leave the lid of the frozen-concentrate jar on the counter rather than dropping it in the garbage can, when the garbage can is easier to access than was the place the lid got left?
Why is it that doll clothes were "put away" by being moved from the middle of the dresser-top to a corner of the dresser-top, when the doll-clothes bucket was right there handy?
Why is it that when you tell a child to "put away" the ponytail bands, they get shoved into the right drawer, but the child does not take the extra half a second to put them in the right spot in that drawer?
This is not rocket science.
This is not stuff that hasn't already been explained repeatedly.
There must be some magnetic frequency running through our house, pushing Stuff away from its proper storage location.
Well, back to the micro-managing....
Thursday, December 28, 2006
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The magnetic frequency must have traveled to my place as well. ;-) It sounds like you have the same problems that I have with my boys. It has also gone so far as to affect how chores are done and remembering to bring things home from school or off the bus. I keep telling myself if their brains were not within their heads then they would lose them somewhere within their mess.
ReplyDeleteOh, Susan! I was going through this very same monologue yesterday! It brings me great comfort to know that I am not alone in the great sufferings of mommy micro-management.
ReplyDeleteSo, at what age do children learn the easy way to keep things clean?
Aaaand...when do they learn that if they just start, Mom doesn't have to micro-manage and things do get done, a little at a time.
I didn't get any chocolate for Christmas. Will you eat an extra piece for me? I think we both need it!
Melanie
Oh Susan, this post gave me a perverted sort of "yea, I'm there too!" feeling. But I can't say it cheered me to know others suffer -- and I do mean that word because that's an apt description of it -- with this malady among their children. In fact, it quite depressed me. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteI get so frustrated with having to tell teenagers what to do, when and how. It makes me seriously doubt IF they could do this on their own when not in our home anymore. I mean, Momma isn't going to be around to tell them these things.
I hate micro-managing their chores because it makes *me* responsible instead of *them*.
Commiserating with you!
Paula
Melanie, they learn to do it when it's their own house or apartment, and they've messed it up enough that they have to clean out those drawers and cupboards. But some people prefer doing those jobs once a year, rather than keeping them clean and orderly and then doing the chore once a decade.
ReplyDeleteAnd Paula, it is not warped to find comfort in other people's struggles. I don't know why, and I can't explain it. But we all feel better when we know we're not the only one.
I don't know if they'll be able to handle all these things on their own someday, but if they can't, then it's their problem. :-) And probably, honestly, my mom was thinking the same thing about me during the 70s, and I've managed to blunder along. Hopefully my kids will do the same.
I'm feeling the same as Paula today. Even threats don't seem to work even when we follow through with them. I've found that DH didn't quit with the mess after leaving his mom's house he just left it up to me now. I'm getting frazzled and my nerves are shot. I just want to light a match and start over some days, today being one of them. ~:-S I think I am starting to get DH to see what I see and I think I may be slowly getting him to realize how our messy house is grating on my nerves and how I can't do it all on my own. Today he even mentioned cleaning the basement for the first time in over 2 years. YA!! Now hopefully it will get done when he comes home from this shift. I can only hope.
ReplyDeleteI can sympathize with mom and kids both here. With mom because I go through this with my kids (and somene else who lives here :), ) and with the kids because this efficiency in dealing with things is something that I am still learning.
ReplyDeleteI don't know how many times a day I get distracted and place something that I was putting away in a place that is completely random and wrong. Then, not only do I need to take time to deal with it again, I often have to find it first!