Your Bank

Barbara had a blog post recently about banks. She wrote about bank failures and gave some information on how to evaluate the safety of your bank. Don't be put off by the language about using this as an economics lesson for your homeschooled teenagers; this is something we should all check out. Our community bank in Darien had a 5-star rating, but our current bank is going downhill with an increasing "troubled asset ratio." Barbara has several links; the easiest one just tells how many stars your bank rates.

Today's Laugh

Where do forest rangers go to get away from it all?


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What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant???


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Whose cruel idea was it to have an "S" in "lisp"?

Today's Laugh

If you can't say something nice, something something surreal.

Bulllies

Some people complain that homeschoolers will never learn to deal with bullies. Hey, I went to public school, and I don't know how to deal with bullies either.

Ignoring them doesn't work.

"Tattling" (also known as "going to the authorities") works insofar as the authority is able to keep watch and is willing to act against the bullying.

Retaliation through physical force or other means is usually not appropriate, besides the fact that it's usually ineffective.

I've heard that the only way that stands a chance is to speak out clearly against the bullying, calling it what it is, in a voice loud enough to bring attention to the bully's misbehavior, and having the whole group agree on certain consequences for the bully, such as being shunned. In other words, those who observe the bullying must side with the victim and not become intimidated themselves.

The thing I struggle with is attitude. I know that behavior follows attitude. If a person behaves inappropriately and clearly has had no change of heart, I struggle with saying "I forgive you" when their apology doesn't take responsibility for what they did. "I'm sorry you were hurt" or "I'm sorry you can't take a joke" is not the same as "I was wrong." Works flow from faith. Good works flow from a right faith; not-nice works flow from a false faith or a me-centered faith. So if you see that the antagonizer has had no change of heart, you can't reasonably expect the bullying behavior to stop.

But I guess --in the Kingdom of the Left-- we don't care about faith. We don't care about attitude. We don't care about outlooks. We only care about behavior. Ill behavior is punished; good behavior is rewarded; we don't care what the motivation is; we just care about the actions. It's just so hard when you know the hurtful actions aren't going to go away.

Today's Laugh

Life is as easy as 3.141592653589...

Split Heels

Winter means split, cracked, painful heels. Taking good care of your feet prevents the worst of the problems, but the dry air from the furnace still wreaks havoc on your feet as you get older.

This year I decided to try comfrey. Comfrey is an herb that encourages skin-cell production; it's good for healing cuts and other skin wounds. I had good luck with it before. I poured olive oil over a shot glass full of comfrey leaves and let it soak for a few days. Using a drop or two of that oil on my heels every day [well, you know how it goes, maybe it's actually 4-5 times a week] has done wonders for the cracking and splitting!

The only problem is that the cat likes to sneak onto my dresser and slurp up the olive oil. Weird Rosie!

Today's Laugh

I was waiting tables in a noisy lobster restaurant in Maine when a vacationing Southerner stumped me with a drink order. I approached the bartender. "Have you ever heard of a drink called 'Seven Young Blondes'?" I asked. He admitted he'd never heard of it, and grabbed a drink guidebook to look it up. Unable to find the recipe, he then asked me to go back and tell the patron that he'd be happy to make the drink if he could list the ingredients for him. "Sir," I asked the customer, "can you tell me what's in that drink?"

He looked at me like I was crazy. "It's wine," he said, pronouncing his words carefully, "Sauvignon blanc."

For the Joy Set Before Him

Once upon a time, Pastor Wieting arranged an evangelism festival. He asked a Pastor Vetter to come speak. It was awesome! Not about what we should "do" to obey some command to "evangelize" people, but it was all about the Gospel promises to us and to our neighbors. One tidbit has stuck with me these past 20+ years since I heard Pr Vetter.

Some people wonder why God allows evil to continue in this world. "If there really were a God," they say, "He wouldn't have allowed evil to continue." Couldn't God have killed off Adam and Eve, and just started from scratch and gotten it right on His second try?

That's when Pr Vetter pointed out that, if God had done that, He wouldn't have had YOU.

We are sons and daughters of Adam and Eve. If our parents had been wiped out, WE wouldn't BE. If there could have been perfect people on the world, they would have descended from somebody besides our first parents, and so WE would not exist at all.

Come, let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (from Hebrews 12:2)

Pr Vetter said that the Lenten verse tells us that WE are the joy set before Jesus, the reason He endured the cross. To have us as His own is His loving motivation.

Today's Laugh

Don't take life too seriously; it's not permanent.

To the Fort

Finished up the bulk of the work on my current editing project. The last steps can be accomplished while I'm out of town this week.

Van is packed full of CCA material. I'm off to symposia to fill in for the deacon for the week ... and to see old friends! The hard part is always the self-discipline -- making ourselves sleep at night instead of trying to squeeze in every last minute of visiting we can.

With hopes of coming home at the end of the week both
-- satiated with the joy of being with buddies, and
-- not drop-dead exhausted.
This is my goal! (And it would be all the cheerier if I hit good traffic through Chicago. But I don't want to wish for too much and push my luck....)

Today's Laugh

The teacher asked the children to draw a picture of Mommy at work. This is Sarah's drawing:




The next day, Sarah's mommy sent this note to the teacher:
Dear Miss Greenwood,
That is not a dance pole on stage in a dancing club. I work at Wal-mart, and that's me selling a shovel.
Yours faithfully, Nancy Anderson.

Today's Laugh

Me? A skeptic??

I trust you have proof...

Dilated Pupils

We saw the eye doctor today to get a prescription for [ta da!] those bifocals I didn't want to succumb to several years ago. Boy, it was the most fun I've ever had at the ophthalmologist! Gary and I spent time in the waiting room with friends who were also there -- lots of laughing and telling stories and having a grand ol' time!

We came out of the building and saw the piles of snow at the edges of the parking lot. Radiant piles of snow. Never saw such shiny, glowing snow! As Gary-of-the-undilated-pupils drove us home, I commented on the fact that my eyes are dilated on such a nice sunny day when I could otherwise have been out soaking up the rays. His response? A perplexed, "Sunny????" Oh.

So, I guess I've found an answer for the lack of sunshine that afflicts us in the north. All you have to do is break into the eye doctor's office, steal bottles of dilating drops, and open up your pupils to the light that's there, and let it stream into your head in humongo doses. Easy as pie! (Shhh, let's not talk about cataracts or macular degeneration.)

And you know what else nice happened today? I saw the new Woodmans being built. I saw the sign on the highway. I saw the concrete front wall that has been erected. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Woodmans is getting closer to being opened!!!! (Okay, so they need three more walls and a roof before they can even begin electrical work or plumbing or finishing or building a parking lot. Still -- "open" is closer than it was! Let us rejoice and be glad!)

Today's Laugh

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Oh no! This one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

Before the Foundation of the World

Tonight we watched the Star of Bethlehem movie. The lecturer begins with the question of whether the star was (zap!) a miraculous phenomenon that God zotted into existence when Jesus was born, or was it instead a naturally-occurring alignment of stars and planets that was part of nature? His conclusion is that the star was a naturally-occurring alignment that God built into the skies when He created the world, such that it would point to His Son's birth at the right time and place.

You were not redeemed with corruptible things, like silver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot. He indeed was foreordained before the foundation of the world, but was manifest in these last times for you. (1 Peter 1)

If it is true that God built this into the stars, that means these signs (Genesis 1:14) were already planned before the creation of man. If that is true, then God knew from before the foundation of the world that Christ, the blameless Lamb, would shed His blood to redeem you.

Okay, I knew that. I knew that God wasn't [gasp!] caught by surprise when man sinned. God didn't have to come up with Plan B to unite His people to Himself.

But think about what that means. It means that He knew before He created man that He would save them. Not only does it mean He knew, but it means He created anyway. He knew what it would cost Him to save mankind from their rebellion and hatred of Him. But He didn't say "Phooey on this; who needs it?"

That is a love too big to comprehend.

Luke and Chronology

Some pastors I know say that, in the first chapter of Luke, Mary's song (the Magnificat) is the greeting that she spoke to Elizabeth when she arrived for her visit. They say that the Gospel message in that song is what caused the baby John to leap for joy in Elizabeth's womb.

Other pastors say "Poppycock. The Magnificat is recorded after Elizabeth told about her joy and her baby's joy at Mary's arrival." They say Mary sang the Magnificat after the incidents connected with Mary's arrival at Zachariah and Elizabeth's home.

Interestingly enough, the story from Luke 3 shows unequivocally that Luke does tell a story and then go back and fill in some details. The reading for the Baptism of Our Lord tells about John the Baptist's ministry and preaching and that he was shut up in prison by Herod. And then Luke goes back and tells about Jesus baptism ... which happened before John was thrown into prison.

Today's Laugh

A man was passing a small courtyard and heard voices murmuring.

He went in and saw an altar with a large zero in the middle and a banner that said 'NIL.' White-robed people were kneeling before the altar chanting hymns to The Great Nullity and The Blessed Emptiness.

The man turned to a white-robed observer beside him and asked, "Is Nothing Sacred?"

Today's Laugh

Top Ten Ways to Terrorize a Telemarketer

10. When they ask "How are you today?" Tell them! "I'm so glad you asked because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died...."

9. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

8. Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?"

6. If they want to loan you money, tell them you are just about to file for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

5. Tell the telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips.

4. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

3. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they cannot give out their HOME number, you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!"

2. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"

And first and foremost:

1. Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.

Mexican Brown Rice Casserole

This is from my sister's sister-in-law. We tried it yesterday, liked it, and made notes of what we want to tweak next time we make it. It meets the requirements for the "ideal recipe": inexpensive, healthy, tasty enough to look forward to a few times a month, easy to prepare, and made from whole food ingredients that are standard pantry items here.


Cook
1 ½ cups brown rice
3 cups water

While rice is cooking,
thaw 10-oz box of frozen spinach,
and squeeze or drain to remove excess moisture.

Combine the cooked rice with
1 ½ cups salsa
2 tsp cumin
1 tsp garlic powder

In another bowl, combine
1 quart (or 2 15-oz cans) of refried beans
16-oz bag of frozen corn (preferably thawed)
1 finely chopped onion
4-oz can diced green chili peppers
1 Tbsp chili powder

Layer in the greased pan:
- half the rice mixture
- bean & corn mixture
- spinach
- 1/2 cup grated cheddar.
- the rest of the rice mixture.

Bake at 375° for about 25 minutes.
Add another 1/2 cup grated cheddar.
Bake 5 more minutes.
Top with plenty of chopped fresh cilantro (optional).

Today's Laugh

Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute;
set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

from Miss Drosendahl, via Miss Rhein's Facebook page